Have you ever wondered how to successfully get sued by your employees? Well look no further, the lawyers at EW Law have come up with 5 tips to get yourself and your company successfully sued. Read below and apply these tips liberally.
Disclaimer: This is neither legal advice nor good advice. In fact, do not apply these tips. If you are currently applying these tips, STOP and call EW Law now!
Tip 1 - Categorize all employee feedback about the culture as negative feedback.
When employees suggest you have a hostile work environment or toxic culture, promptly label the employees as cultural misfits and bad hires. This will allow you to ignore the warning signs that some brave employees are giving you.
Tip 2 - Conduct workplace investigations to disprove complaints instead of fact finding.
Investigate all claims in a manner to counter the basis of the claim. This will ensure the company is protected and those pesky claims are negated. Fact finding and root cause analysis is for chumps.
"The more that is swept under the rug, the more we will make." – Plaintiff's Lawyer, Huey Will Payus, Esq.
Tip 3 - Do not implement Diversity, Equity, & Inclusion strategies.
These strategies are a waste of time. Leaders do not have time to handhold employees, if employees want to be included, they are more than welcome to contribute. Your culture is fine the way it is.
Tip 4 - Ignore high turnover and blame it on unfit employees and the job market.
There is a trusted saying about turnover, it goes something like this,
"People do not leave leaders, they leave because they are selfish. So, if turnover is high, do not concern yourself, it is just ungrateful employees leaving for more money."
Tip 5 - Immediately terminate employees who complain about protected concerns aka those pesky whistle blowers.
As soon as an employee speaks up about potentially unlawful conduct, go ahead and show them the door. Do not put up with such unloyalty. In words of an unknown not so great leader,
"get rid of them!"
In all jest and in an abundance of sincerity.
Please do the opposite of what we have discussed above. Engaging the hearts and minds of your employees will inspire them to add tremendous value to your company and most likely prevent them from suing you. Listen to them, they tend to have good insight.
The employment attorneys at EW Law are here for you in the event you desire solid employee engagement strategies or by chance your employee(s) are preparing to sue or file an EEOC complaint against your company.
Contact EW's Employment Attorneys or simply ignore this blog post. Either way, the attorneys at EW Law will be here for you when you need us. Contact us today for a complimentary consultation.
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